Much Better

My heart was
a seashell you
threw against the
the wall so
each shard became

a heroin needle
you used to
inject my veins
with sweet venom
launching me high
as comets especially
your candied lie
that you knew
me better 
than
I knew 
myself
but you knew
nothing 
nor cared
to 
know anything
so why did
you bother to
convince me I
was my own
enemy then lock

me in my
mind’s corner closet
a fictional therapy
and private hell
even my closest
friends couldn’t tell
because when I
cried they said
I was too loud
they said I
should calm down
they said I
was a lunatic
so I pulled
out my teeth
and sliced out
my tongue to
keep myself silent
while you praised 
me whispering I
was the most
beautiful hostage that
you ever saw
and you wouldn’t
change a thing
until one day
you let me
escape without one
pure apology so
here I am

my liver alcohol
soaked while you’re
unaware of the
callouses I’ve grown
from the millions
of hurtles I’ve
had to jump
to get over
wounds your actions
seared into scales
on my skin
“nobody will listen
to a snake”
you said, forgetting
that snakes shed
so these words
are my skin
shedding off your
crimes and your
self loathing too
I refuse to carry
them and I
never needed to

because your guilt
belongs on your
shoulders only 
not
mine and I
I know that
much 
better than
you 
know yourself.

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About RebeccaFionna

Poetess and Dragon goddess since 1992
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